By: By Stephanie Pappas, Senior Writer

Published: 12/20/2013 12:49 PM EST on LiveScience


The worst stereotypes of science suggest that it's boring, staid, or overly complex.


Not these studies. More often than people may think, science gets downright dirty, peering into bedrooms and asking nosy questions about secret fantasies. The science of sex is anything but dull.


With that in mind, here are 10 of the sex stories most likely to have caused blushing in 2013.


1. More housework, less sex?


Egalitarianism in household chores[1] may not lead to scorching hot action in the sack, according to research published in February in the journal American Sociological Review. The study researchers found that men who did "feminine" chores such as cooking and washing had less sex than those who did not.


The research was correlational, so chores may not be a direct turnoff, but egalitarian relationships may be less spicy, the researchers said. However, research does show that people in equal partnerships are happier.



2. After baby, women wait


Doctors usually clear new moms to have sex six weeks after delivery, but most wait a bit longer — at least for vaginal sex. Whereas 41 percent of women had resumed vaginal sex[2] within six weeks, 65 percent had by eight weeks. By 12 weeks, 78 percent had resumed sex. By six months, that number was 94 percent.


But more than half (53 percent) of women had engaged in some sort of sexual activity by six weeks, the researchers reported in February 2013 in the BJOG: An International Journal of Obstetrics and Gynaecology.


3. So do dads


After childbirth, moms aren't the only ones who experiences sexual changes. Dads have highs and lows, too. Fatigue, stress and babies who won't sleep were the main factors keeping new dads from feeling sexual desire. Factors such as their partner's breastfeeding or vaginal bleeding were less of an influence, researchers reported in August 2013 in the Journal of Sexual Medicine.


4. Sex for headache relief


"Honey, I have a headache" may be more of a come-on than an excuse, at least if a study published in March in the journal Cephalalgia is to be believed. According to the study, about a third of migraine sufferers get relief from getting busy.


It's not clear why sex would relieve some migraines[3] , but endorphins released by the brain during sex may explain the soothing effect, the researchers said.


5. Bats have oral sex


Humans aren't the only species to get sexually creative. A bat species called Indian flying foxes (Pteropus giganteus) does, too. Male flying foxes perform oral sex[4] on females before penetration, researchers reported in March 2013 in the journal PLOS ONE. The oral sex seems to prolong the sexual encounter, the researchers said, perhaps increasing the chances of conception. The male bats may also be removing competitors' sperm from the females' vaginas, they added.


6. Hookup culture isn't so wild


Popular media often portrays modern college students as hopping from bed to bed in a series of casual sexual relationships. But "hookup culture" is overblown[5] , according to research presented in August 2013 at the annual meeting of the American Sociological Association.


Researchers compared responses from national representative surveys of 18- to 25-year-olds taken in 2002-2010 and in 1988-1996. They found that in both groups, about 31 percent said they'd had one sexual partner in the last year. Only half reported having more than two sexual partners after age 18. In other words, college kids don't appear to be getting more promiscuous.


7. Sex as exercise?


Those college kids could be missing out on some moderate caloric burning, according to research published in October 2013 in the journal PLOS ONE. The study used wearable fitness monitors[6] to track couples as they had sex in the course of their everyday lives. It found that sex burns an average of 4.2 caloriesa minute for men and 3.1 calories a minute for women.


That's better than a walk, but not as good as a jog. While sex may not be the most efficient exercise for weight loss, the authors noted that at moderate intensity, it could count as part of someone's daily workout.


8. Hookups don't lead to orgasm for women


Casual "hookup" sex is anticlimactic for women much of the time, according to a November study of 600 college students. Hookup sex[7] was half as likely to lead to an orgasm as sex within a relationship for women, the researchers found. Relationships may be more orgasm-friendly for women, because her partner learns what she likes and cares about her needs, the researchers suggest.


In other climax news, orgasms may start in the foot[8] . A 55-year-old woman whose experience was reported this year in the Journal of Sexual Medicine said the sensation started in her left foot, traveled up her leg to her vagina, causing what felt just like an orgasm achieved during sex.


9. How hormones influence sex


The hormonal influences on the female sex drive are tough to uncover, partially because many women in relationships may have sex when they're not necessarily "in the mood." But for a study published in October 2013 in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, researchers took a hard look at how the hormones associated with ovulation influence sex drive. It turns out that single women have more sex around ovulation[9] , suggesting this window of fertility may nudge women toward sex. However, women in relationships were less influenced by biology, the study found.


10. Male birth control blocks sperm


The search for effective and safe male birth control beyond condoms continued in 2013, with a promising rodent study suggesting there may be hope for manly contraception. The method uses a combination of drugs that allow sperm to be produced as usual, but prevent that sperm from traveling[10] through the vas deferens and out of the urethra during ejaculation.


The road from rodent studies to human drug trials is long, but researchers are hopeful, they wrote in December in the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences — though there is one catch.


"A lack of ejaculate has the potential to be disconcerting," the researchers wrote in their study.


Follow Stephanie Pappas on Twitter and Google+ . Follow us @livescience , Facebook & Google+ . Original article on LiveScience[16] .[11] [12] [13] [14] [15]





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  • 1. Don't Talk Yourself Out Of What You Need


    It's too easy for us women to convince ourselves to settle for less. We're so helpful and accommodating, so eager to please and afraid of rejection that we're quick to give up the things we need, including when it comes to sex.

    What we need to see is that doing this will leave us chronically frustrated. While it's true that every relationship requires a certain amount of compromise, going without the things that we really need just doesn't work. We'll end up unhappy in the relationship or resentful toward our partner.

    The bottom line is, we need to know what we can't live without, sexually, and what we just can't live with. We ignore these non-negotiables at the expense of a fulfilling sex life.




  • 2. Share Your Needs And Feelings With Your Partner


    If you can't ask them for what you want in bed, you shouldn't be sleeping with them. Good sex happens when we feel safe and at ease. If we're afraid to ask for something or to tell our partner that we don't like something, sex will never be more than mediocre.

    This second tip follows from the first one, in that once we identify what we want and don't want, we have to express these things clearly. It's unfair to expect our partner to be a mind-reader and "prove" that they care by somehow knowing what we want without our having to tell them. Healthy sex comes out of healthy communication.




  • 3. Accept Your Body As It Is Now


    We need to be in touch with our bodies; with what feels good, what feels not so good and what feels wrong. We also really need to stop judging ourselves in terms of our weight and our shape. Only a superficial dope would give us a hard time over our imperfections. If someone makes us feel bad about our physical selves, this is more a reflection of his inadequacies than of our own.

    Our negative self-talk has to stop. The running commentary on how fat we are, how much cellulite or how many wrinkles we have is guaranteed to kill the mood, often before it even starts. Feeling good about our bodies is crucial if we're going to let go and enjoy ourselves. Being physically self-conscious will keep us from experiencing the joyful abandon of great sex.




  • 4. Never Refuse Sex As A Punishment Or Use It As A Reward


    In the bad old days, some women were led to believe that the way to get a man to toe the line is to offer sex for good behavior or withhold it when the man has displeased them. Most of us today recognize this as hateful behaviour and a recipe for disaster.

    Men don't want to be controlled or punished, especially around sex. They don't want to be made to feel like little boys. When we're hurt or angry at our partner, we need to share our feelings with him in an adult way. We can even say that we're too upset for sex, right now. What we mustn't ever do is make him feel like we're deciding when he gets to have sex, based on whether he's been "good" or "bad."

    On the other hand, using sex as a reward turns us into sex objects and makes sex into a commodity for our partner to "earn." It's no longer two people being intimate or enjoying each other. Commodifying sex makes it into a business transaction and our bodies then become objects for trade.




  • 5. No Pets In The Room


    We might love Fluffy or Rover, but they don't belong in the bedroom when we're being intimate. Our pets are very territorial and could get jealous or want to play, too. Dogs might bark or even growl. Cats might jump onto the bed and start walking around. We can avoid these disasters by remembering to shut the door and leave our four-legged friends outside.




  • 6. Have A Sense Of Humor


    Sex is about connection and intimacy, but also it's about having fun. It can be mind-blowingly great or occasionally, things can go wrong. Having a good sense of humor about sex will keep things in perspective.

    Being able to laugh at ourselves and at the comical aspects of sex will take the pressure off the whole experience. We might love and adore our partner, but we don't have to be so serious about making love to them. Humour relieves pressure and is a great way to connect.




  • 7. Enjoy The Give And Take


    The best sex is the kind in which each person is trying to please the other one. The sharing in sex is one of the things that make it great. It can be technically amazing, but when one person gets the impression that the other person really isn't there with them, it can ruin the whole experience.

    What makes someone a fantastic lover is not their technical ability or their repertoire of moves but their attentiveness and their efforts to make their partner happy. When both people show that they really care about meeting their partner's needs, sex becomes something wonderful.